SIngle again and again and again and again and again

Jeremiah David Schwit and me recently started dating. Ever since the 7th grade we where best friends. BUt we where also secret lovers. He cheated with me on his baby's momma Brenda who he still loves and they are probably going to get back together. I refuse to be played.

Mike aka task-We just messed around & he never asked me out.

Josh Bounds aka Serge- We dated for 2 days because I found he does crack.

Jordon TylerFrankhouser- We dated for almost 3 years and I am offically over him.

Joseph Allen Swann- I still love him & we dated for 6 months.

Eathen Leder aka Drone[Emur]-We messed around & now we are homies.

Cutting

I have been having alot of diffculties in my life. & dealing with them in this way is not the greatest. You will loose alot of your friends.

When the worst gets worser.....

My birthday is in a few days and I will most likely get my ass beat. Now my grandma is in the hospital with her husband. My dad is a complete jerk and I am trying to avoid him as much as possible. I spoke to my mother yesterday and all she had to say was that I shouldn't need to depend on my dad so much.

refreshing you on my current life....

About 2 wednesdays ago I moved back to Yakima. Basically I have not been in school since then. Can't stop smoking weed like every 5 seconds because its the only thing that keeps me smiling. Did I stupid thing and tried to fling myself into a new relationship because I can't handle being aloone for some reason. Eventaully it will be summer and it will be all better. Fo my sake I hope so. God so the kid I threw myself at had some other girls yes thats plural girls on his mind. He was no good either all he did was smoke himself stupid. I am considering getting back with a former ex of mine. Joe and I spoke yesterday it felt nice. But any Kody conduff is the former ex I would die to see what he looks like now though.

One of those weeks

Well I'm week keeps getting worse. My best friend ran away. My boyfriend and me are fighting. I couldn't get to school and there was no point in walking because its a two hour walk. My sister and brother are always picking on my youngest sister. My mom is going back to nights. My dad is going broke. I need some help and aparently so does everyone.

Rest in Peace My cat Melina April 12th around 4:00am

I woke up to the sound of barking. Just as I heard a screech for help. Kay I hope that wasn't real. Lucky me I was wrong. Melina meows for help I go out thier and my dog Chula has firm grip on her body. Now I spray my dog. Oh and Melina scratched me up trying to protect herself. Please note this happened at 2:00am. I held her til she stopped breathing..

Easter

I honestly could have had a much better time it seems to me no one on this damned planet has some sense of humor but whatever. I have been feeling like shit all day today. SO I shoved my mouth full of boiled eggs and candy guess what? That didn't help me out too much. I recall when I was little I would be able to digest anything now that is not the case. I was inspired by my uncle that he is going to college at such a old age.[PROVES ITS NEVER TOO LATE]

Merry Christmas Eve

So far I woke up to the laughing of my little sister and baby cousin. The drew all over my face. Then I baked like a mofo. Afterward I played wall ball outside in the cold. I took a shower. Then I changed into my dress. Did my hair & make up. I went to see my boyfiend:) made my day. Came home fixed my flatened hair. Set the table. I told everyone to come over at 5. No one got here til 6:40. They started taking over the kitchen so I sat there and watched. We prayed & then ate. Now I'm on here so take a guess on how its going.

I wish that I could go back in time and make it up to you ...

Homecoming was great and I have no regrets. Oh how I wish we where the homies that we use to be. Please be cool with me like that again. Question that gets me why did we stop talking? Right now I'm just like whats going on? So I would just love for you to be my friend again. Talk to me like you use to. Usally I wouldn't just write this out for you to see , but I can't help it. Very suprising I know right. What if we had gone out huh? You would just stop talking to me. Also would you ignore me like you do now? Basically I'm right. Can't you just admit it to my face. Damnit you always have to show so much freaking pride. Elhier won't you be my frend?

I'm at the point where I'm not sure what I want...

I want to be succesful but at the same time I dont want to work for it if that even makes sense.

My father...

Now that I'm older I realise how horribel I am. Oh man I miss you so much. Please out down your pride and just be with Mena. Remeber when you said you loved me no matter what stupid shit I did. So know that I will always love you no matter the stupid shit you didi have done I dont care about that. Talking about you to anyone is stupid because all they do is critasize you for who you are. Usally I will defend you as much as I can but sometimes its hard. Wondering about you hurts to much. You know I wish you would call me.

Well if only it was that simple

So today I was reading this book called Harrison Bergeon By Kurt Vonnegurt Jr. It was about how one day if we try so hard to be equal that some people will be treated like animals. I think it will be so unrealistic. I wonder what will happen years from now when I actually start caring about politics.



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